Saturday Audition Adventures

I went to an audition on Saturday night. I haven't been on an audition in quite some time--for many reasons. So I went. And it was...well, it was.

For some auditions, you walk in, you do your thing, you don't get much back from the other side of the table. And then you walk out and it's done. It doesn't feel like anything has happened. And you don't really feel anything in particular about it; you wonder what you should eat for dinner. That kind of audition. This was very much that kind of audition.

In all honesty, I think I realized halfway through the audition that I'm probably not right for the project. I would certainly do it if I got it, but it isn't really the most appropriate choice for me. On paper, I am intellectually attracted to it. But there's no pull, no tearing at the guts, no have-to-do-it feeling. It's also very sensitive subject matter; I have no immediate personal connection or relationship to it, so speaking the words feels a bit like trespassing. It would certainly be an interesting challenge and it would be tough, but it isn't necessarily right.

And it was bad cold read copy. Sort of. Some of it was. It was the kind of material that is really easy to do poorly. To sentimentalize it instead of to make it a reality.

Anyway, I went in and read through all of the monologue choices. There were way too many, literally there had to have been at least twelve. I got there 20 minutes early (early is on time, on time is late, and late may as well not even bother) and probably spent the first ten minutes just picking a monologue. My point is, it would have been easier if there had been fewer choices. There was no need for that many choices.

I finally picked one, read it over a few times, and just tried to relax. I had total indigestion (more a result of pizza and coffee than nerves, bad pre-audition choice) and just felt icky (okay, maybe some nerves). Eventually I went into the room and sat down and did my thing. On the one hand, I didn't think I was very believable. On the other hand, I didn't think I was totally unbelievable either. I took the minimalist approach and tried to just tell it (which was a traumatic experience, by the way) as much like one of my own memories as I could. I don't know if it was what they were looking for, but it's what I did. And I think I did it pretty well. At least, I definitely felt when I wasn't doing it. In that respect, I was proud of myself.

After that they gave me another piece to read. Same idea, more or less. They didn't really say anything. And I don't know if that was because they'd decided it wasn't worth it or because there just wasn't much else to say. I think it was the latter. So they stopped me partway through the second piece, gave me the rehearsal schedule info, and told me they'd be in touch in the next week or so. Short and sweet.

I may get it, I may not. The audition didn't really give me any indication one way or the other. And, really, I don't much care one way or the other. Which is sometimes a great way to audition, especially if you're just getting back into it. Every audition can't be a matter of life or death. Not that you should treat any audition as less important, but, let's face it, reality says that some of them are. If I don't get it, no worries. If I do, it will be a challenge and I'm sure I'll learn something. Nothing to do but wait and see!

Also, I'm glad I went, if nothing else. It means I started, which is sometimes the hardest part. And now all I have to do is keep the ball rolling...

So if you're thinking about doing something, stop thinking, and just do it. Jump in.